Officially old

Change from beginning of program: -1.2
Goal: 43 LBs to go
Activity: watching the Mavs lose
Temptation: beer
Fruit and veg: 3

How sad is this? I spent my New Year's Eve watching my current home team beat my old home team in basketball, then I came home and put away my Christmas tree.

I guess I really am old.

Eating was not too good today.

Breakfast: Fiber One pop tart and cherries

Morning snack: caramel corn

Lunch: salad with vinagrette on the side, then a fish burrito (fried fish with remoulade and cabbage wrapped in a flour tortilla) with salsa

Afternoon snack: three Reeses minis

Dinner: nachos at the game, then 3 slices Pizza Hut thin & crispy veggie lovers

Drinks: 4 beers at game, 2 at home

Evening snack: two Cellas

In other words, too much crap and not enough fruit and veg. Kind of like 2009.

Am I really old?

Change from beginning of program: -1.2
Goal: 43 LBs to go
Activity: spending $$
Temptation: Cellas Dark
Fruit and veg: 3

I received my AARP application a few days ago. I have been so upset that I haven't been able to discuss it.

Geez, Louise...I won't be 50 for 10 more months!

On the other hand, I can start socking away more money into my 401k. And AARP does have nice discounts...

But I'm not ready to be an old person, dammit!

On another note - I'm getting serious about this weight thing again. I have been eating with impunity for months and my stomach is protruding for all to see.

Breakfast: homemade veggie soup and 6 Cellas (yes, 6...because I was working at home today and they are right there in the cabinet)

Lunch: Red Lobster, because I wanted those delicious cheese biscuits. I had 3 1/2 biscuits. (Did I mention that I have been eating with impunity?) Popcorn shrimp. Salad with blue cheese dressing. I brought 1 1/2 biscuits and all of the baked potato home.

Afternoon snack: 6 more Cellas. Damn those Cellas! Why do they have to be so delicious?

Dinner: Sweet potatoes (not much). 4 Miller Lites.

And in between all that, I spent over $1500 at Home Depot on the bathroom renovation. Unfortunately, that is just a dent. This is gonna cost me...

When did subtitles get longer than the books?

Or is this what it takes to sell a book in the 21st century?

Because I'm a nerd, I keep a journal of all of the books I read (or listen to). I had gotten behind in writing my reviews, so I sat down tonight to catch up. The last three books I read/heard all had subtitles, and it took longer to write the title/subtitle in my journal than it did to write the review!

What happened to simple, powerful titles like The Grapes of Wrath and Cat's Cradle?

The most clever subtitle author is Jen Lancaster, with these gems:

• Bitter is the New Black: Confessions of a Condescending, Egomaniacal, Self-Centered Smartass, or Why You Should Never Carry a Prada Bag to the Unemployment Office
• Such a Pretty Fat: One Narcissist's Quest to Discover If Life Makes Her Ass Look Big, or Why Pie is Not the Answer
• plus two more books with really long titles/subtitles and that contain the word "ass"

(I never noticed until now that all of her books have the word "ass" on the front cover.)

The books I entered in the journal tonight:

• The Sharper Your Knife, the Less You Cry: Love, Laughter, and Tears in Paris at the World's Most Famous Cooking School by Kathleen Flinn
• Barack Like Me: The Chocolate Covered Truth by David Alan Grier and Alan Eisenstock
• I Met the Walrus: How a Day with John Lennon Changed My Life Forever by Jerry Levitan

Up next - a book with no subtitle! The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown.

What have I learned by writing this post? If I want to get a book deal, I need a good subtitle.

Drinking with abandon

Change from beginning of program: -1
Goal: 43 LBs to go
Activity: coughing
Temptation: sweets
Fruit and veg: 5

Holy crap - 12 days since my last post? I blame the holidays.

You do not want to know what I have eaten over the past 12 days. It has been a lot. It has been a lot of sugar and fat. It has not been pretty.

Over the weekend, I went to Big D for not one, not two, but three gift-opening sessions. And they were on opposite ends of the area, so I spent a good portion of the time in the car.

I stayed at my brother's house, where I always drink with abandon. I drink more when I'm around other people who are drinking. We stock up on beer and put the car keys away for the night. And we drink. We often play board games - including the Beatles Trivial Pursuit that I got for Christmas. We laugh - a lot.

In other words, we have a blast.

And I feel just a tad worn out the following day.

Three nights of that + a 3-year old with a nasty cough + over 600 miles in the car = one tired and coughing kitten

I'm taking it easy for the rest of the week to knock this cough out before it knocks me out.

And I cannot be upset with my beautiful niece, even if she did share her lung-rattling cough with me.

Why can't I have the perfect body?

Change from beginning of program: +.2 - holy crap!
Goal: 44 LBs to go
Activity: drooling over LeBron - the most perfect body of our time
Temptation: fudge
Fruit and veg: 5+

How is it that I am gaining weight?

It cannot be related to the fact that I'm baking something every night in December.

Or that I have no physical activity more strenuous than wrapping gifts.

Or that I'm drinking like it's going out of style.

Must be the weather.

Or the meds.

Can't be my diet. Check it out.

Breakfast: Because I overslept - again - and then spent an inordinate amount of time cutting today's treat (Rocky Road Bars), grabbed a ham and cheese kolache on the way to the office. Yes, ham. And cheese. Baked into a beautiful yeasty roll.

Morning snack(s): Satsuma. Good. Two pieces of fudge. Bad.

Lunch: Holiday celebration at local Cajun restaurant. From the appetizer platter: fried catfish strip, a few fried crawfish nuggets, and crab casserole - a delectable mixture of crab, stuffing, and cheese...glorious cheese. House salad with vinaigrette. Fish burrito with rice pilaf. A bite of blackberry cobbler.

Dinner: Chinese food before the basketball game. Egg roll smothered in duck sauce. Mixed vegetables with steamed rice. No fortune cookie - BASTARDS!

Game libations: Two beers. Then three more when I got home.

Late night snacks: Cream cheese icing (from icing a carrot cake) and brownie bits (from cutting the brownies that are going to the office tomorrow).

When is this going to end? Obviously, I'm not too worried about it, or I would do something. Something other than eat. And drink.

360 miles in the fog and rain - uphill all the way

Change from beginning of program: -1.8
Goal: 42 LBs to go
Activity: driving
Temptation: mimosas
Fruit and veg: 5+

Drove 360 miles (roundtrip to Austin for a meeting). Morning: fog. Afternoon: rain. Meh.

Got up an hour early to make it to Austin for a 9:00 conference call.

Breakfast: veg soup and multigrain bread. Two Cellas.

Snack: ham and cheese kolache from the bakery in La Grange where they make the best kolaches in the world

Lunch: shrimp with vegetables at a Chinese place in Austin. Hot and sour soup, some fried rice, egg roll, fortune cookie. My manager and I got the same fortune. Hidden meaning?? I don't know.

Dinner: Olive Garden with friend and her children. Salad, half a breadstick, about 1/3 of the capellini pomodoro. But it was really orichette pomodoro because they were out of capellini.

Evening: leftover bits of blueberry goo bars (variation of cranberry goo bars - instead of cranberries and walnuts, blueberries and pecans). Mimosas. Hey - I'm trying to drink all of that fresh satsuma juice before it goes bad. Get off me.

Still need to wrap gifts and get my cards done. Tomorrow is another day - another opportunity to drink and get to those tasks.

Massage and a movie

Change from beginning of program: ?
Goal: 40+ LBs to go
Activity: getting a massage
Temptation: chocolate
Fruit and veg: 5+

Cable guy arrived at 8:30 and woke me up, so I didn't get a chance to weigh first thing.

Breakfast: 2 strips of bacon

Lunch: seafood burrito, chips and salsa with my massage therapist after my massage

Dinner: 2 bowls of homemade vegetable soup with multigrain bread from Costco - where every damn person in Houston was shopping today

Evening snacks: fudge, Cellas, mimosas

I remember now why I don't drink orange juice - it does not get along with my stomach. For some reason, I can drink fresh grapefruit juice by the gallon but orange juice of any kind just kills me.

My massage therapist and I saw The Yes Men Fix the World. It was funny but depressing at the same time, much like Capitalism: A Love Story.

I managed to get in a bit of holiday shopping, in between grocery stores. It was kinda horrifying out there.

Saving satsumas from snow

Change from beginning of program: -1.0
Goal: 43 LBs to go
Activity: harvesting fruit - in the snow
Temptation: pretty much everything
Fruit and veg: 5+
Number of satsumas harvested: 125

All week, they have been forecasting snow. I don't believe the weathermen unless they say it will be hot.

Turns out they were right.

Before work, I decided to harvest satsumas before the big freeze. But it was sleeting, so I dropped that idea.

Came home from the office around 1:00 and picked as many as I could (125). At least 50 more are still on the tree, but they are not ripe yet. None of the grapefruit are ripe. Let's hope it doesn't freeze tonight because I really want that fruit.

Breakfast: potatoes from the company cafeteria

Lunch: tomato basil soup and Greek pizza

Dessert: hummingbird cake that I made for someone's birthday

Dinner: homemade vegetable soup and several mimosas made with the gallon (yes, gallon) of juice I squeezed from the satsumas. Mandarin oranges. It takes a lot of damn oranges to get a gallon of juice.

While I was juicing, Bigfoot commented that I was doing a lot of work to get just a little juice from each fruit. He was right. But it is damn good juice.

Another day, another 26 gifts wrapped

Change from beginning of program: -1.2
Goal: 43 LBs to go
Activity: being frustrated
Temptation: pecan squares
Fruit and veg: 2
Number of gifts wrapped: 26

Breakfast: Pecan squares. I'm going to call this recipe "Pecan Moaners" because as people tried them in my cube, they all moaned. Yes, they were that good.

Lunch: Indian buffet. Sadly, I had too much food to list.

Dinner: Leftover dill rice from the Persian restaurant yesterday. Satsuma.

Evening snack: Five beers and choco crumble bars (tomorrow's treat).

I'm almost finished wrapping gifts. As soon as they get done, it's time to move onto doing cards.

I love December.

I hate January. The colored lights come down. The sales end. Everyone is in a bad mood. I can't wait.

I am not the help desk

Change from beginning of program: -1.2
Goal: 43 LBs to go
Activity: being frustrated
Temptation: fudge
Fruit and veg: 3
Number of gifts wrapped: none

Overslept.

Cut the fudge to take to work and put it in a Beatles lunchbox. Picked up the lunchbox and discovered that it wasn't latched. Dropped 1/3 of the fudge on the floor. Cursed.

Breakfast: fudge

Morning snack: satsuma

Lunch: Persian restaurant. Flat bread with feta cheese, basil, and mint. Greek salad. Hummus. Dill rice.

Afternoon snack: fudge

Dinner: Two brown-n-serve rolls with butter. Beer. Leftover mac and cheese. Beer. Raw cauliflower. Beer.

Evening activity: Tried a new recipe, which is DE-LI-CIOUS. Crust of butter, powdered sugar, and flour. Filling of pecans, whipping cream, butter, brown sugar, and butter.

If I die tonight, I can say that I died happy because I ate those wonderful pecan bars!!

Other evening activity: Helping Bigfoot with his computer. Again. I hate updates. He loves them. Of course he loves updating because he doesn't do the work. I do. For the past two hours, I have been trying to update a PC that says it has known issues. KNOWN ISSUES. To me, that means "give up." To him, that means "keep trying until you make K want to choke someone."