Chicken pox or VP shooting?

US Vice-President Dick Cheney has accidentally shot and injured a man during a quail hunting trip.

The victim, named as Harry Whittington, was on the trip with Mr Cheney at a ranch in Texas when the incident took place on Saturday.

Mr Whittington, 78, was taken to hospital in the town of Corpus Christi, where an official said he was "very stable" and had rested well overnight.

This is something that happens from time to time - you know, I've been peppered pretty well myself Ranch owner Katharine Armstrong

The men were part of a quail hunting expedition at the Armstrong Ranch in south Texas.

Ranch owner Katharine Armstrong said Mr Cheney had turned round to shoot at a bird, unaware that Mr Whittington was behind him. He sprayed Mr Whittington with shotgun pellets.

"The covey flushed and the vice-president picked out a bird and was following it and shot. And by God, Harry was in the line of fire and got peppered pretty good," she said.

'Good spirits'

Mr Whittington was hit in the cheek, neck and chest, but was said to be "alert and doing fine" in hospital.

Giving an update on Mr Whittington's condition on Monday, hospital administrator Peter Banko said: "It's not critical. It's not serious. It's just stable at this time."

Mr Whittington's daughter, Sally, told the Dallas Morning News her father was being observed in hospital because of some swelling from the welts in his neck.

"It looks like chicken pox, kind of," she said. "He was very, very lucky that nothing seriously was injured."

Why "Pho Snow"?

He Who Shall Not be Named (aka Bigfoot) has always called me Snow. As in my skin is as white as snow.

Now, after 8 years, he has given me a new name. I told him the meaning of "faux" - fake. A few days later, he said that my new name was "faux" because I have lots of faux items, most noticably a gorgeous faux cheetah coat. When I asked him how to spell it, he said "P-H-O."

I pointed out that "pho" was Vietnamese soup. But the name stuck.

So now I'm Pho Snow. A fake white person. Which is appropriate because he says that I'm more black than he is anyway.

Some days, I feel like Spongebob

I don't live in a pineapple under the sea. My best friend is not a starfish. But I do retain water like sponge. I'm always swollen. Pink Floyd sang about "those swollen hand blues" over 20 years ago. I felt them then, and I feel them now.

Other days, I feel like Patrick. Big and pink and slow.

My coworkers probably say I'm most like Squidward - cynical and totally over it.

But I'm probably most like Mr. Krabs. I want me money!

Skittles

What are Skittles anyway? They are delicious, but what are they made of? Other than sugar and artificial flavor, or course.

Have you ever tried to describe a Skittle to someone who has never had one? I asked a few people to do so, and I got a variety of answers.

I would describe a Skittle (original flavor only - the variations are abominations) as a small, chewy, slightly tart, fruit-flavored candy. They are about the size of plain M&Ms. The inside is chewy, and they have a more solid outer coating. They come in yellow (lemon), orange (duh), green (lime), purple (grape?), and red (who knows?). Red can be cherry, strawberry, raspberry, tropical punch, or any number of other flavors. I think that red Skittles are just generic red flavored.

Others described Skittles as being like jelly beans. Huh? Jelly beans are nasty. And their innards are much softer than Skittles centers.

As I have always been on a diet, I try to avoid candy of any kind. If I do indulge, I want dark chocolate. But a few years ago I heard Homer Simpson drool over Skittlebrau. "Uuuummmhhh, Skittles and beer. Skittlebrau." It is a nice combination because the beer cuts the sweetness of the Skittles. This is a typical basketball game snack for me.

The Rockets cannot win a game. I paid my season ticket money last summer, so I have to go to the games. The highlight of each game is getting out my bag of Skittles. I pour some into my hand and eat them two at a time in this order (least to most favorite): orange, yellow, green, purple, red. The bags that I have bought lately seem to be low on red. That's the story of my life.

Observations on Weight

I believe that there is a finite amount of weight in the universe. When one person loses weight, another person gains same said weight.

I have been walking on this stupid treadmill for seven months now, and I have lost about 8 pounds. This is just not right! I walk for 40 minutes a day, 4-5 days a week, at about 3.2 miles per hour. I sweat like a pig. I breathe hard. My heart rate is WAY up. So what is the problem?

I'll keep trying, but I need to take a few days off. I have a new pair of Adidas, and I have blisters on the backs of both ankles. I'll enjoy my rest.

The Beatles and East Texas

Today I made progress on a project that I started last month - listening to all of the Beatles albums in the order in which they were recorded. I'm a nerd like that.

I started my most recent edition of this project on the drive to Dallas for Christmas. Today I drove to East Texas to meet my sister and nephew for some shopping and Mexican food. Only in Texas would I drive 200 miles in a day for shopping and Mexican food. But I digress.

The Beatles recorded only about 10 hours of music. I have listened to all of the proper albums (British versions), and I'm now working on the "Past Masters," which were songs that were never included on the British albums. And by listening to them in recording order, rather than release order, I listened to "Let it Be" before "Abbey Road."

By listening to the albums in order, it is easy to hear the phases of the Beatles' musical development. For example, in what I call the "middle period" ("Rubber Soul" and "Revolver"), virtually every song has a tambourine. And they all have one of those shaker things that sounds like an empty can with a few dried beans. It's not a maraca, but it's the thing that you would hold in an upraised hand in front of you and genty shake back and forth. You know what I mean.

I need to remember that listening to the Beatles and singing along in my car can drastically improve my mood. If anyone else were in the car, their mood would not improve and would probably darken because if I'm singing no one else needs to hear it. I have been down all week because I spend most of my daytime hours around soul-sucking individuals. Most times, I can shake it when I get home, but this week I could not. But today's combination of retail therapy, Mexican food, and the Beatles has made a dramatic improvement in my outlook.

Tomorrow's goal: get back on track with the diet and treadmill.

TV and Annoying Laugh Tracks

I haven't posted in a while because I have been busy watching "24." What a great show! The first episode was so intense that I couldn't stand it. Now I have something to look forward to each Monday. That may be what gets me through each week.

So much TV is just plain crap. For example, a show called "Crumbs" debuted recently. I read two glowing reviews, so I decided to watch it. It was horrible. Same old sitcom crap. Maybe I'm weird because I don't like what everyone else likes, but I found no humor in the show. This episode even featured two grown brothers, with one holding a stinky show over the other one's nose and mouth. How enlightening! And this show had a laugh track, which drives me up the wall. Are people who watch sitcoms so ignorant that they don't know when to laugh? That's what I think the producers are thinking when they add one.

"My Name is Earl," "The Simpsons," and "The Office" don't have laugh tracks, and they are light years funnier than the mainstream sitcoms.

Went to the Houston Rockets vs. Dallas Mavericks game last night. It was a beautiful thing - if you are a Mavs fan. They killed the Rockets. The people behind us said that they were leaving when the Mavs got a 35 point lead. They left in the third quarter. It is a real challenge to make it to the Rockets games this year, and it's getting worse. Time for a new coach.